Lessons from 2021 – February or the Power of Awe

When you saw the featured image for this post, the photo of Niagara Falls, did that give you any pause to wonder at the beauty and awesomeness of nature? Did you stop and think about the photo and how cold it may be? Or, what might the thaw be like in a few months? Or, did you just move over the photo of such majesty to my writing for this month? If you moved right over, take a moment to look back at the photo for a few moments – 30 seconds tops – and wonder about the large scale of the photo and just how cold the surrounding weather may feel on your skin and face. Close your eyes if this helps. See if you can feel the freezing spray on your face and hands. How cold is it? Does your coat and hat give you adequate warmth? How does that feel? I’ll wait here for you.

Done? Welcome back, Dear Reader. Welcome to the end of February. This month is loosely titled “The Power of Awe” and how being in a state of wonder makes our lives a bit easier to live. Didn’t the Falls leave you in a state of wonder? Like, how small I am in the world? It is this feeling of awe, of wonder, that we begin to pass over in our adulting. We think we’ve seen it all, know all, and, well, are experts in this thing we all call life. And, I’ve learned how just a bit if wonder creates that feeling of childlike playfulness that we lose by degrees through living. The power of wonder or “awe” cannot be diminished. Read on, Dear Reader, and I hope you get a little bit of inspiration in your “awe”.

During this month, I read a new book by Dr. Ethan Kross called Chatter: The Voice in Our Head and How to Harness It. For those of you unfamiliar with Dr. Kross’ work as I was, linked here is an interview by Anderson Cooper on his show Full Circle with Anderson Cooper. This is an easy-to-watch, 30-minute primer for you to see if this book may resonate with you as much as the message resonated with myself. Kross is a professor of psychology and management at the University of Michigan and director of the Emotion and Self Control Laboratory with the University. Or, no slouch. The book is chock-full of referenced information and studies so this is not just one person’s opinion.

For me, this information also correlates to companion to another book of a similiar nature called The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. Both are excellent reads and touch on very similar subject: the voice inside us. Each tackles the idea of mental chatter, and the source, dangers, and necessity but from different perspectives. This chatter creates the emotions or feelings that then drive our behavior. How we think about something (or, the chatter) really determines how we feel and, accordingly, how we respond. I’ve done quite a lot of blogging on my realization that I even had this voice – and the negativity it espoused. An area that Dr. Kross discusses is about the power of nature and awe in such a unique – yet, not unique – kind of way. This is something that has provided me comfort throughout my life yet I never realized why. How did you feel looking at the photo? Did that sense of wonder give you a bit of a release from your own personal chatter? The comfort of nature and feeling my own smallness has helped me in the past but I was never aware of why. I just knew it worked. With the knowledge I know have from Kross’ book, I can move forward to use the power of nature and awe more deliberately in my life. I’ve learned this month that deliberate intention helps to frame the situation so that we can achieve the maximum amount of benefit from the experience in whatever way we choose.

To harness this type of thinking, one must be conscious of our perceptions and, most importantly, be open to correct our misperceptions. Many times, our perceptions can come from outside influences or factors. However, these external features must process through our discerning brains and, violá, misperception is created. (I think my name could be Miss Perception, but I digress.) Both of these books discuss our inner voices, the feelings that drive our behaviors and beliefs. Many of us don’t even realize this voice is separate from yourself; the voice is how you make sense of your world, and it is designed to keep you safe. It formulates our perceptions, both internal and external. The voice, however, if left untended, can take over the how you think of something, too, through a pattern of behavior that we’ve found helps us cope with “whatever” – stress, anxiety, fear. Times of extreme ‘whatever’ heighten some of these perceptions or beliefs and create all kinds of challenges that, as humans, we love to overcome.

During these days of the Pandemic, we see this in our daily news. People are trying to cope through making sense of their situations. As a result, we can be more susceptible to false narratives because they are convenient and we really want answers, to understand. These narratives make some sort of sense to us or come from a source that is known and, usually, reliable. But, are they real? Many times, when we question our beliefs, we are faced with the facts of the situation and the realization that our thinking was wrong. Yet, we continue to defend this thinking because we don’t want to be or cannot accept that we were wrong. Facing our wrong assumptions takes guts and vulnerability. In the middle of a Pandemic, my guts and vulnerability are on high alert so our sense of self protection is highlighted. Many of us get a lot of our sense of self from being right so, when faced with “wrong”, the response may be out of the norm: explosive, violent.

Like water, we humans like to find the easiest route to or through things. This voice comes out in how people perceive you and you them. The voice impacts your assessment of the present situation and the resulting conclusion or judgement about the matter. You can tell a lot about someone by how they respond and, most importantly, you can tell what it is they believe about you, themselves, and the situation. In a video game I finished called Concrete Genie, the main character (Ash) is chased and bullied by other kids who are struggling with their own demons. Ash is painting his world more beautiful and removing the shadows of leftover emotions in the town. When my character is captured and held by these children, he is unwaveringly calm and not fearful. These bullies ask why he is not scared, he responded that he realized their anger towards him was not about him but about them. You know, it always is that way, even with our own anger. Many times, we mistake this negative thought about one’s self as an external “trigger” and the misunderstandings escalate; this trigger is actually internal and under our own control. Couple this with our inability actually listen with an open mind, these misunderstandings grow and grow, based on a false or misunderstood premise. We then argue over something that is so far and away from the true issue that we forget the real matter and just are trying to be right. (Speaking from experience.)

See how sneaky the ego gets into the middle of this? As get older, we get much better at this way of thinking, too, and it becomes comfortable. As humans, we want to have some understanding of our surroundings This may be why older people could be more narrow-minded in their thinking: Their mind just stopped listening yet kept judging. When we stop listening, we lose the ability to view the extremes of a situation. Stopping listening = stopping thinking. Once you are in this pattern, how can you stop yourself as that voice keeps egging you on? Continue reading, Dear Reader.

I’ve noticed this pattern with myself where I can stop listening as I’m in my head, thinking about things, tossing over, ruminating. At times of extreme stressful thinking, I tend to go outside in nature and find comfort in having my thoughts filtered through my surroundings. Being in nature has always helped me to slow my thinking down, becoming more at ease. I struggle with rushing to judgement before actually paying attention to the details, like trying make sense out of something that just cannot be understood. It is these times where our faith is tested; our faith in our beliefs and, basically, ourselves. When my first husband became comatose about three weeks after we were married, I sat for days outside, with my own thoughts, in my Adirondack chair, noticing how the spring came in, watching my backyard begin the ritual of a seasonal change. Being in nature gave me the peace of mind I needed to begin each day and understanding that the world had its own plans and that my little life plans were really unimportant in the larger view of life. This feeling, at its truest, positive sense, was a feeling of awe. Once I settled into the idea that the life I had planned with him was not to be, my greiving became more about missing the person and not the life we were supposed to have – obviously, the life we had planned was not to be. I was crying over the loss of the expectation of life being a certain way. In my daily trips to the hospital, I would open my sunroof in my car to feel the air outside and the sunlight and comfort of being warmly cuddled. This gave me strength to sit by my spouse and ensure he was being being cared for. It was during one of these trips that I felt the extreme release of just giving up as I sat in my car, struggling with my emotions. It felt like a turning point of allowing me to stop mourning something that was never to be. In this, I felt a sense of awe, of smallness. I had figured out something about myself and that my role was to help my spouse exit his life as it was done – and was not going to include me anymore; my life was meant to continue but without him. The awe I felt at this realization was extremely humbling and allowed me to move on, both in my mental space and my heart space.

I’ve had this feeling of awe throughout my life but at the strangest times. Many times, I just disregarded the power of awe through a mechanical understanding of the science behind the “awesomeness” I’m witnessing in the moment. Have you ever had the powerful awe of a beautiful sunset where you just feel so small and inconsequential? (This is the oppposite of how your ego believes things to be.) You can just behold the sight of those rainbow hues, or you can just rationalize that this is a result of light and weather and is nothing to really be excited about. My mother used to tell us that Santa Claus was baking cookies and the beautiful orange, red and purple hues that would jet across the evening sky was the heat and love from his oven. I used to think that Santa had a really big oven, too, given all the kids he visited. I also used to wonder why he needed to bake his own cookies when we left them for him already. I figured he was baking for the elves since they did not taste the treats that Santa obviously devoured when visiting our house! To this day, even on the other side of the country which is where I now live, sunsets like this create a sense of awe in me with the fondest of memories, too.

I think this type of thinking has a correlation in mainstream religous teachings, too. Forgive my lack of bible education but I do recall the story of Adam and Eve who, after eating from the tree of knowledge, began to see the Garden of Eden differently – or with greater knowledge. It was this knowledge that removed the wonder, the awe, of living an Earthly life. Just because, as adults, we now have greater knowledge should not change how you look at life or you, too, will begin to forget how small we all are in the world. Why not view life with the childlike wonder of a small boy receiving a much desired toy for his birthday, or the “Tooth Fairy” dropping by a few coins or trinkets in exchange for the loss of a baby tooth? In its simplicity, the belief creates a sense of awe just like the frozen waters of Niagara Falls. When you have a sense of wonder, you see things differently and are less apt to put your old, tired judgments into your thinking.

I’m reminded about other times where I’ve felt a sense of awe and had no idea – and my health actually improved. In my late teens and early twenties, I did some traveling throughout Europe with a dear friend. Each trip was usually 4-6 weeks, and I’d come home about 20 pounds lighter. Not for lack of eating – oh, no – for I ate the local cuisine, tried all of the local beers (Hello, Germany!), found that I loved English chocolate treats, and would enjoy it all. I was so excited to find something new and different each day, too! We traveled to a new site – a cathedral like Salisbury Cathedral shown here, or stately manor or palace, or museum, or even just the shops in town – and took it all in with a sense of awe. When I would come home, my mother would wonder if I ran out of money since I had lost weight and must have stopped eating at some point during my trip. Very interesting that I would lose weight while really enjoying life. Yet, in my day to day, I struggle with weight and body image issues. (Not sure what to make of this but I find the link with awe very fascinating and something I will be exploring for myself.)

I still live in nature as it has provided me with a sense of comfort, of being in the world. The awe is all around me, like the wonder of huge mountain ranges that have stood throughout generations and generations. The dense trees that have stood hundreds of years, raising families of trees through their natural process. A few years back, I took a 5K walk through the woods at Mohonk Preserve with a person who was much more physically fit than myself. I know it is 5K because, when I got home, in my utter exhaustion, I trail-mapped our route. During our hours-long hike, I struggled with the heat and hills, making it up to a prominent vista where we could sit and enjoy views of the Hudson Valley from high atop a mountain. (I contemplated the embarassment of giving up and needing to be airlifted from the tower, too. ) Want to know what I remember when I think of this event? The view, my company and the wonder of how beautiful nature is; the soreness of my body for three days later are of diminished memory now. The awe? Still with me – and makes we want to go again.

I’ve realized that a sense of awe is extremely powerful, and something we just take for granted. Because I know the science does not mean that I can’t still be amazed and delighted at thinking that all of these trees came from something so basic that it (life) exists despite all of our efforts to tame nature. Because we know how something may have formed into existence should not remove the awe we have in its appreciation. As we get older, however, the sense of awe gets diminished with the daily trials of life. This doesn’t mean you need to go outside all of the time to get this sense of awe. Dr. Kross so eloquently states that “…the feeling of awe, however, is by no means restricted to nature and the great outdoors. Some people experience it when they see Bruce Springsteen in concert, read an Emily Dickinson poem, or take in the Mona Lisa at the Louvre. Others may have awe-drenched experiences when they see something extraordinary in person, like a high-stakes sports event or a legendary object like the U.S.. Constitution, or witness something intimately monumental, like an infant taking its first steps. Evolutionary psychologists theorize that we developed this emotion because it helps unite us with others by reducing our self-interest, which provides us with a survival advantage because groups fare better against threats and can achieve loftier goals by working together.” Fascinating work, Dr. Kross, with tons of practical application.

As I was writing about my lessons learned from January and how perception and beliefs shape our thoughts, I was simultaneously thinking about how much better February was going to be, and I immediately felt a sense of relief. “Perception, Bitch!” is my new mantra for February ala Jesse Pinkman-style. The reason I thought it would be better is because my horoscope told me so. No fact, just pure belief changed my mindset while blogging which really stopped me in my tracks. Just how much of my perception is decided through a dirty lens that I have left untended? During these months going out in nature is hard and my natural coping mechanism is inhibited by mounds of snow and ice, and with extreme temperatures. I have found something new for my awe: myself. You see, I think I’m pretty awesome; it has taken me half a century to realize this. Not in an unhealthy, better than you way. No, for, Dear Reader, I think you are pretty awesome, too! If you are joining me on this rock we call Earth, moving at such speeds we cannot even fathom, give yourself a pat on your back as being really awesome! What you make out of life is truly what you get. You can take the minute you spent talking to a nice lady in a grocery store, spending a little extra time to help her reach a high shelf, and learn so much about yourself in the process in that you create your own “awe.” (I did!) Life is a series of these moments; no judgment, just moments. It is how you perceive these moments that gives you anxiety or grace. You get the choice. Choose wisely. Peace.

Lessons from 2021 – January

This is a new series I will be starting as a reflection of the month that just passed. I do so much living in my head with all of my best and worst memories keeping me company. Instead of just keeping them all company myself, you, Dear Reader, will be pleased to hear that I would prefer to leave the past back in my rear view mirror. Like many of you, we can do so much living in our memories that these experiences color our perspective of today. Today cannot be compared to anything: past or future. Sort of like, living in the present without the noose of the past, looking forward to what will be. (I highly recommend it.)

We made it through the first month of 2021 and many of us are already writing the year off and wishing for 2022 already. During the first week of January – January 6th precisely – an attempted “coup d’état” or a “coup” for short was had on the U.S. Capitol building in Washington, D.C. For those of you who don’t believe that the definition applies, check the dictionary at the link to the word. I’ll wait until you come back.

This “coup” was beyond a shadow of a doubt instigated by the sitting “president” of our country. I quote the title because I’ve never seen less presidential behavior and we’ve gone through the gamut of behaviors. The lesson, however, has been a deep one for me on how to handle adversity or disagreements – and what NOT to do. Many times, this lesson of what not to do is actually more important than following someone’s example. This realization gives one a viewpoint of the choice we all have during these moments of extreme emotion; a bit of a “step back” to really “see” the situation without emotions or without a “dog in the race” so to speak. I think that “stepping back” is my mantra for 2021. The examination of life, today, versus what life was like at any past time is a comparison. There are no emotions in the comparison if one just observes as if from the heavens, or “above it all.” (I like that saying because it just is a different perspective. If you think that the term “above it all” is triggering, that may be something you can examine to help you.

If we accept that what is in our “present” moment is truly all we can expect of ourselves, and that all is okay, how does that make you feel? Better? Worse? There is no right or wrong answer with feelings for they are just little tidbit indicators to us on our perspective. It is the higher expectations that cannot be fulfilled that can create a feeling of defeat…or help me to adjust my expectations to something that feels better. If you feel a sense of frustration, that is a cue to stop and examine why. Frustration is our own internal barometer of our expectations. Many of us feel frustrated as a response to something unknown or uncomfortable. Our frustration, however, can be based on the expecation of our own personal performance…or a perception of a lack of performance. We can see this in almost every aspect of life and we’ve never really been taught how to handle frustration in a constructive manner. Work, play…it is always there.

Take my goal setting, circa 2020. Last year, I began my normal “Cultivate What Matters” exercise. I’ve found this tool extremely helpful in the past two years. However, for 2020, everything just fell apart by March and my life was and continues to be barely recognizable to what was in February 2020. My lack of control for anything really pressed me so much so that my “Cultivate What Matters” effort became very basic: Survival. In March, I had planned to visit my family in Florida and, now, it has been almost two years since I’ve seen my mother and sister. (The thought brings me to tears as I write this.) I have also been unable to see any of my husband’s family as they are over two hours away and the journey would require that we stop for a bathroom break which may be unavailable. Then, we’d only be able to look at each other and the feeling of wanting a hug or touch would be overwhelming. All of my relationships, friendships, and any plans I may have had were flushed down the toilet by the beginning of April 2020.

Boy, was I frustrated which resulted in a spiral of depression. I realized about September – yes, I ruminated that long – that I can dwell on what I cannot change, become miserable and a crying blob, or I can focus on what is: The choice is mine. Either is OK and each just gives me different living experiences. Not good, not bad; these are valuations or judgments. The experience is just different. Last year, I chose the totally scrap my CWM and figure the BIG PICTURE of just how to survive. Setting goals like finding an exercise class or art class were out if the gyms are shuttered and art classes cancelled. Rather than crying over the spilled milk, I cleaned up the spill and poured another glass. Done. What I’ve learned from the experience has helped me to grow in new ways – ways that I would have never been able to access pre-Pandemic. I’ve been able to peel back the “onion” of my life with each layer resulting in my returning to memories for comfort. In that rumination, I’ve been able to correct some judgments and to learn from the experiences as an adult.

During this process, I recognized that I had absolutely and unequivocably no control over anything outside of my response or reaction to life and living. How I viewed the situation – or my perspective of the situation – would create the feeling of that situation for me in my world, today. My past experiences created judgments in me that I applied to the current day so, in effect, my life in the present was based on the judgments of my past. If my judgments were “off” as, I imagine, is quite common with children having more “adult” experiences, how would these judgments impact my perspective for today’s world? Dear Reader, it is simply this: I found I was using my prior experience to judge today and I was creating limitations for myself on what I thought was the limit – and not the true limit – for there are no limits except those that we assert on ourselves.

For a survival situation, the ability to make a quick and correct decision may be the difference between life or death. Deciding on a can of vegetables in the grocery store clearly is not “life or death” unless one is in The Last of Us, Part II, of course were a can of peas is a Godsend. (Oh, such a great game, too! Don’t get me started. ) I’m seeing more clearly and I use my own self perception a bit differently. Yes, I said “Use my own self” because I’ve realized that there is a lot more to me than this carbon based lifeform I currently occupy. Resourceful ways. Exciting ways. It is how we think of things that determines our perception. Period.

Let me give you a real life example and you tell me which mental construct “feels” better to you.

Toby - with his favorite toys — Photo taken by Author

This is my dog, Toby. He was adopted from a rescue shelter about eleven years ago. He is 12-1/2 and is in good health. There were a few points, though, where he almost died due to a genetic disposition to make bladder stones. This happens in some Dalmatians, and Toby is one of these dogs. We were twice given a choice: Surgery or die. This was very traumatic for us as he is our baby and, like all animal parents, you feel like this little animal, who trusts you and depends on you, is relying on your decision-making skills. His eating habits are very odd because of complications from these surgeries which resulted in poorly managed stomach acid during the his first surgery that scarred his esophagus making eating solid foods very difficult. His esophagus narrowed so he is now on a mushy or liquid diet which takes some preparation. This will probably be for the rest of his life. It took us years to realize this because he cannot tell us what is happening! Poor thing. He is doing better and has a very strict diet that involves liquidizing or grinding his meals. Given my work schedule and commute, my husband had the chore of feeding Toby twice a day and to give him his medicines to help manage the stomach acid. With my working full-time at home now, I have taken over feeding him breakfast and his early morning medications, which is probably one of the highlights of my day. Why?

It wasn’t always like this. Due to the preparation, feeding Toby felt like a burden. As I was preparing his breakfast one morning and felt that feeling of negativity – the burden – wash into me, I asked myself a question: Is feeding Toby really a burden? Or, are you just used to feeling that way when you have something that is difficult to do? That also got me thinking about the different energies and how a burden feels as opposed to a privilege. Does my negative energy drift into the food I was preparing for my loyal and trusting canine? Oh, the thought of that really made me stop and realize that I get the opportunity to care for this little creature whose big brown eyes look at me in patient anticipation. How could I ever think my sweet boy was a burden for me? I began to see my feeding him as the privilege it is – many people would have not been able to care for him. He (and us) were so lucky to have him in our lives. We have not had a proper vacation in many years as our boy cannot be boarded with such serious medical issues. And, do you know something, both my husband and I believe ourselves blessed to care for him.

Perspective – in our news and our lives – is so important to maintain. When something doesn’t feel right to you, it helps to distance yourself and examine the situation without emotion, without judgment, and just be within the feeling. I’m currently working through the idea of resistance and how the resistance to the feeling actually magnifies the situation. I’ve come to also realize that how someone else “feels” is not really my business but their own. If feelings are to help shape perspective, who am I to deny you, Dear Reader, the ability to shape your own world just how you’d like it to be…for you.

What an incredible January! Peace.

Jedi Mindset for 2021…and Beyond

Caution: If you are planning to watch “The Mandalorian” don’t read any further unless you want to hear of a major plot spoiler. You’ve been warned.

During the Pandemic, I’ve been able to complete a lot more studying of different subjects. Many of these subjects involve some aspect of the human condition or mental accuity. I’m in the middle of listening to The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer as a book recommendation from a work colleague who shares an interest in all things leadership and human potential. [This is a book I’ll need to buy for my library as highlighting an audiobook doesn’t work too well for me. 🙂 ] I highly recommend this book for additional reading for anyone interested in a better understanding of the composition of the universe and their higher power – or “the Force.”

I’ve long been a believer of “the Force” but not as described by the Star Wars books where it can be directly manipulated to such a degree….I wish. (Can you imagine the fun you’d have?) No, this “Force” is our mindset or perspective. It is the feeling we have within ourselves when we don’t know the feeling. The Untethered Soul discusses this in great detail. Singer has also written a book called The Surrender Experiment which will be the next book in my collection. A very good interview with Singer and Tami Simon of SoundsTrue can be found on YouTube which discusses both of his books. In fact, Singer has shared his information very freely and there are many interviews of note that provide very different aspects of what Singer means by an untethered soul and surrendering. I believe that it is our life’s journey to work within The Force, to live our life as we intend; it is what happens that creates new opportunities for learning more about “The Force.” For example, if you believe that there is no coincidence in life, then the daily activities that encompass what we consider as “life happenings” would have no meaning. Like finding out that we avoided a car accident by taking a left turn at a light earlier than you normally do. Coincidence? Perhaps. Maybe not. Think about these life coincidences this way: What if these life happenings are happening FOR us, not TO us? Did you notice that the feeling with each thought is different? Sit with this for a while and really think on this: How would you respond if you believed that life is happening FOR you for a greater purpose? Wouldn’t some of these happenings, then, have a different context? I like the correlation of how “for us” and “the Force” sound so much alike. Hmmm.

As I began to contemplate the “for me” aspect to my life, I began to journal and this helped me to get my thoughts out of my head and on to paper. Since I am a visual person, I’ve learned that writing things down when I’m bothered or when I have an important decision to make really helps clarify my thinking. I guess “seeing is believing” holds true in this aspect of mentagility, too. I’ve realized that everything in my life has happened for me to learn and respond to…there is no emotion that would need to be included here although I have certainly spiced my life with all kinds of emotions – good, bad, and everything in between. We all have done this, haven’t we? It is how we are taught to live our lives – or it is the lack of teaching at a young age that is now requiring correction as an adult. I cannot imagine what my life would look like now had I learned this at age 16 when first presented with these aspects of myself. I was unready for such knowledge as this greater understanding only comes after years of experience for the knowledge to really sink in. About two years ago, I heard the other voice that Singer describes and was startled at the realization of the voice in my head…and what it was saying that kept me so small. I wrote an entire blog post of the experience, too, without knowing just what happened and have an understanding of what this event meant to me and my future.

Cue to The Mandalorian. I love all things Star Wars, Marvel, DC, anything fantastical with powers. Maybe it was my desire to overcome a bullying childhood? I’m not sure but one area I’ve always loved is how Luke Skywalker used the Force to fight the evil Empire. Now that the Empire is sort of in the back seat for the Republic (Is evil really ever gone from the world?), my husband and I began watching The Mandalorian a few weeks ago…and already finished the two seasons in about a week. This is a record viewing for us as we normally take our time between watching television and video gaming, playing all types of immersive games. So to watch two seasons in a week had us set aside our normal gaming time. All of the enemies in The Last of Us, Part II get a reprieve. (BTW, finished that game just yesterday. What a thrill of both shock, horror, and of overcoming odds!)

Our tale opens with the Mandalorian character struggling between the new world order and the ways of his people from the planet, Mandalore. The main character is Din Djarin who plays most of the series with his armor and helmet protection as is custom for Mandalorians. He finds a creature that is childlike and is considered a bounty for some of the Empire evil-doers. Djarin – as The Mandalorian – fights to return the creature to his own people and it is Djarin’s struggle for his version of “right and wrong” that we view in each episode. In the final scene of the second season, with all of the characters in the Control Room of the Empire’s ship with Moff Gideon‘s Death Troopers pounding the door in – and making this a good effort, too – a lonely X-Wing fighter comes and lands in the ship. The characters in the Control Room see this “help” as insufficient because there is only one ship and dozens of these Death Troopers (which were really scary). The X-Wing’s entry actually brought a stop to the attempts to break in the door as these Death Troopers turned their full attention to the new arrival. Just who is coming to help? These evil killing machines all turned to attention and awaited the arrival of the single occupant aboard the ship.

Our rescuer has the posture of a Jedi, cloaked in black, and is really handling the light saber like an expert. Still and confident, the Jedi strides through this ship making quick work of an entire platoon of Death Troopers without even the appearance of a struggle. (I’m conversely cheering and crying about now, hoping that my “friends” in the Control Room are saved through some miracle.) The lone occupant, wielding a light saber, expertly deals with these soldiers who just drop at the slash of a saber or the sudden crushing movement of large containers. (Prior to this, we witnessed the Mandalorian and all of his comrades fighting a losing battle against the Death Troopers so this was such a relief!) After handling the squad, the Jedi waits at the door for the Control Room occupants to release the lock. In the meantime, Moff Gideon, played by the unbelievably talented Giancarlo Esposito, realizes just who may be at the door for his eyes widen and he becomes visibly shaken. Gideon, who covertly moved his robes to hide a dropped weapon from the previous battle, takes this hidden gun out to quickly try and commit suicide. Gideon would rather kill himself that realize his fate at what awaits in the dark Jedi robes. Watching Gideon’s face as he sees the Jedi striding towards them, and seeing the realization of just who is approaching, is such a beautiful piece of acting that I’m going to link this here. Giancarlo Esposito is one of my favorite actors. Who can forget his masterful work in “Breaking Bad”? Esposito truly plays complex and dark characters as if he was truly evil. He isn’t and I digress but, if I ever meet Mr. Esposito in person, I will still be very, very cautious. (Yikes!)

Back to our story. The Control Room door opens. Dramatically, the black robed and hooded igure steps in the room to remove his cloak hood and reveal himself as Luke Skywalker – a young Luke Skywalker. Oh…how my heart just skipped a beat watching the Luke Skywalker of my childhood engage with The Mandalorian’s crew. What a fulfilling ending to this season! I’ve watched the end scene three times now and will probably watch it a few more times. There are certain scenes in movies and television shows that are so iconic, they must be watched a few times to be fully absorbed. Remember the final blow to the Empire in Star Wars? Or, the iconic final dance number in Dirty Dancing with Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey. Swayze’s character utters the famous line that “nobody puts Baby into a corner” is just repeated on its own and most folks know the reference. (That is, most folks my age but I digress. You get my point. Oh, and for those of you keeping track, I had a fine time rewatching that Dirty Dancing scene again for this post.)

This final scene from Season Two of The Mandalorian was one of those scenes I had to rewatch but not necessarily only for the obvious reason. Oh, yes, the scene was an exciting one for fans of the Star Wars saga. What impressed me was that the Jedi never went looking for the fight; he/she let the fight come to him/her. When the fight reared its arms to punch, the Jedi dodged to the opposite side to avoid the punch which put him in a better position to duck and shift his weight to combat from the opposite side. In other words, the Jedi waited for the other to be the aggressor so he could respond to the action in a way that was not reactive but responsive. When the aggressor Death Trooper hit left, the Jedi gave way to give him access to the open spot that the Death Trooper made through it’s aggression. Perhaps one could say that he waited for his opponent to make their first move before he responded.

Waiting for an action where clear response is necessary is the key to many of life’s challenges. If you believe that you control your destiny, you will always be striving to get ahead of what appears to be “bad.” “Bad” is emphasized here because that is a judgment based on one’s values to “bad” to me is not necessarily “bad” to someone else. We’ve heard the saying to wanting to “get ahead” of the situation; I use this term quite often in my daily life. Many times, “getting ahead” means identifying the common root cause of an event to be able to prevent the event or the resulting response from said event. As humans, we may be actually doing this on the regular without the realization that, if we just let life flow a bit, we may ride the situation a while to find out a very different alternative. This “flow” is an energy that we interpret as thoughts, emotions, feelings, or any other more esoteric energy. Many times, the interpretation is based on our own frequency of where we are at the present moment. Like, if you are frustrated, you may only see those things that are frustrating you because the energy matches the frustration. This is how the power of positive thinking is derived. Think positively and you’ll only notice the positivity. If we only knew that what we surround ourselves with and immerse ourselves in each day may “set” this frequency and you don’t even understand that this is happening. We may have been taught that these energies are external from us, that are happening to us.

What if these events are happening FOR us?

Would we be so quick to try and control these events?

I began to realize that life is happening FOR me is an easier way of living – for me. I emphasize the “for me” because I believe each of us needs to find our own approach. Living with the realization that life is happening FOR me is such a relief that I have been working to see this in all aspects of my life. The “FOR ME” gives me a feeling of an observer which takes all of my emotion and thinking outside of myself. So, today is the beginning of February and many of us here in the northeast are planning to hunker down due to inclement weather. What if this is happening FOR me? What can I do to make this belief be my normal energy? More on this in our next discussion. For February, stay warm, enjoy your cocoa, and be thankful for your blessings. In life, it is ALL a blessing. Peace and prospertity to you all.

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